Frequently Asked Questions About Buddhism
edited by
John T. Bullitt

Over the years I've received scores of e-mail queries from people seeking answers to basic questions about Buddhism. Here are my answers to some of the most common ones. These answers reflect my own opinions and interpretations and in no way represent a "definitive" Theravada Buddhist point of view. My hope is that these answers, along with the accompanying links and references to suttas and other texts, will serve as useful hints to steer you towards finding answers of your own.

Buddhist doctrine and terminology   

Is Buddhism a religion or a philosophy?   

The Buddha referred to his teachings simply as Dhamma-vinaya — "the doctrine and discipline" — but for centuries people have tried to categorize the teachings in various ways, trying to fit them into the prevailing molds of cultural, philosophical, and religious thought. Buddhism is an ethical system — a way of life — that leads to a very specific goal and that possesses some aspects of both religion and philosophy:

It is a philosophy.
Like most philosophies, Buddhism attempts to frame the complexities of human existence in a way that reassures us that there is, in fact, some underlying order to the Universe. In the Four Noble Truths the Buddha crisply summarizes our predicament: there is suffering, it has a cause, it has an end, and there is a way to reach the end. The teachings on kamma provide a thorough and logically self-consistent description of the nature of cause-and-effect. And even the Buddhist view of cosmology, which some may at first find farfetched, is a logical extension of the law of kamma. According to the Dhamma, a deep and unshakable logic pervades the world.
It is not a philosophy.
Unlike most philosophical systems, which rely on speculation and the power of reason to arrive at logical truths, Buddhism relies on the direct observation of one's personal experience and on honing certain skills in order to gain true understanding and wisdom. Idle speculation has no place in Buddhist practice. Although studying in the classroom, reading books, and engaging in spirited debate can play a vital part in developing a cognitive understanding of basic Buddhist concepts, the heart of Buddhism can never be realized this way. The Dhamma is not an abstract system of thought designed to delight the intellect; it is a roadmap to be used, one whose essential purpose is to lead the practitioner to the ultimate goal, nibbana.
It is a religion.
At the heart of each of the world's great religions lies a transcendent ideal around which its doctrinal principles orbit. In Buddhism this truth is nibbana, the hallmark of the cessation of suffering and stress, a truth of utter transcendence that stands in singular distinction from anything we might encounter in our ordinary sensory experience. Nibbana is the sine qua non of Buddhism, the guiding star and ultimate goal towards which all the Buddha's teachings point. Because it aims at such a lofty transcendent ideal, we might fairly call Buddhism a religion.
It is not a religion.
In stark contrast to the world's other major religions, however, Buddhism invokes no divinity, no supreme Creator or supreme Self, no Holy Spirit or omniscient loving God to whom we might appeal for salvation.[1] Instead, Buddhism calls for us to hoist ourselves up by our own bootstraps: to develop the discernment we need to distinguish between those qualities within us that are unwholesome and those that are truly noble and good, and to learn how to nourish the good ones and expunge the bad. This is the path to Buddhism's highest perfection, nibbana. Not even the Buddha can take you to that goal; you alone must do the work necessary to complete the journey:

"Therefore, Ananda, be islands unto yourselves, refuges unto yourselves, seeking no external refuge; with the Dhamma as your island, the Dhamma as your refuge, seeking no other refuge."

— DN 16

Despite its non-theistic nature, however, Buddhist practice does call for a certain kind of faith. It is not blind faith, an uncritical acceptance of the Buddha's word as transmitted through scripture. Instead it is saddha, a confidence born of taking refuge in the Triple Gem; it is a willingness to trust that the Dhamma, when practiced diligently, will lead to the rewards promised by the Buddha. Saddha is a provisional acceptance of the teachings, that is ever subject to critical evaluation during the course of one's practice, and which must be balanced by one's growing powers of discernment. For many Buddhists, this faith is expressed and reinforced through traditional devotional practices, such as bowing before a Buddha statue and reciting passages from the early Pali texts. Despite a superficial resemblance to the rites of many theistic religions, however, these activities are neither prayers nor pleas for salvation directed towards a transcendent Other. They are instead useful and inspiring gestures of humility and respect for the profound nobility and worth of the Triple Gem.

Note

1.
According to Buddhist cosmology, every living being dwells in one of thirty-one distinct "planes," of which our familiar human plane is but one. Some of these realms are home to beings (the devas) with unusual powers and extraordinarily subtle and refined physical bodies — or even no body at all. Their god-like status is, however, short-lived; like all living beings, they are mortal and ultimately subject to death and rebirth in other planes according to the purity and skillfulness of their actions (kamma). One of these devas, the Great Brahma, is so clouded by his own delusion that he believes himself to be the all-powerful, all-seeing creator of the universe (see DN 11).

See also:

Is Vipassana the same as Theravada?   

No.

The Pali word vipassana — often translated as "insight" — has a variety of meanings. First, it refers to the flash of liberating intuitive understanding that marks the culmination of Buddhist meditation practice.[1] In the Pali discourses vipassana also refers to the mind's ability to witness clearly as events unfold in the present moment. In this sense it is a skill that a meditator develops using a broad arsenal of meditative tools and techniques. With practice, this skill can bring the meditator to the threshold of liberating insight.[2] In its third meaning, one that has become especially popular in the West in recent years, "Vipassana" (usually with a capital "V") refers to a system of meditation — vipassana bhavana, or "Insight Meditation" — that is based on an interpretation of the Satipatthana Sutta (MN 10), the Buddha's concise "how-to" guide to the development of mindfulness (sati).[3]

Followers of the popular Vipassana movement often cite the Satipatthana Sutta as the essence of the Buddha's teachings; some even claim that the instructions it contains are the only ones necessary for achieving liberating insight. Theravada Buddhism, by contrast, embraces the thousands of discourses of the Pali canon, each highlighting a different aspect of the Buddha's teachings. In Theravada each discourse supports, depends upon, reflects, and informs all the others; even a discourse as important as the Satipatthana Sutta is seen as but a single thread in the Buddha's complex tapestry of teachings.

Although many students do find all they want in Vipassana, some have a nagging sense that something fundamental is missing. This reaction is hardly surprising, as the Satipatthana discourse itself was delivered to a group of relatively advanced students who were already quite experienced and well established in the path of Dhamma practice.

Happily, all those missing pieces can be found in the Pali canon. In the Canon we find the Buddha's teachings on generosity and virtue, the twin pillars upon which all spiritual practice is built. His teachings on the recollection of the Buddha, Dhamma, and Sangha serve to strengthen the development of saddha (faith, confidence), which provides a potent fuel to sustain Dhamma practice long after we return home from that meditation retreat. In the Canon we also find his teachings on the drawbacks of sensuality and the value of renunciation; on developing all the factors in the Eightfold Path, including those that are seldom explored during organized Vipassana retreats: right speech, right livelihood, right effort, and right concentration (meaning jhana). And there is much, much more.

In Theravada, the path to liberating insight does not boil down to a single meditation technique or to being continuously mindful. The path to Awakening is full of surprising twists and turns but, thankfully, the Buddha left for us an assortment of tools to use and skills to learn to help us safely make the journey.

See also: "What is Theravada Buddhism?"

Notes

1.
Buddhist Dictionary: Manual of Buddhist Terms and Doctrines by Nyanatiloka (Kandy: Buddhist Publication Society, 1988).
2.
See "One Tool Among Many: The Place of Vipassana in Buddhist Practice" (Thanissaro Bhikkhu)
3.
The modern Vipassana movement grew out of the tradition of Satipatthana Vipassana, a meditation system based on the Satipatthana Sutta and developed by Burmese monks in the early 20th century. By the 1950's the Burmese teachers Sayagyi U Ba Khin (a layman; 1899-1971) and Mahasi Sayadaw (a monk; 1904-1982) had independently codified and institutionalized these teachings, making them widely accessible across South Asia and, eventually, the West. The Satipatthana Vipassana approach to meditation continues to enjoy widespread popularity among laypeople in the West. See Satipatthana Vipassana: Insight Through Mindfulness by Mahasi Sayadaw (Kandy: Buddhist Publication Society, 1990) and The Essentials of Buddha Dhamma in Meditative Practice by U Ba Khin (Kandy: Buddhist Publication Society, 1981).
If we're all reborn when we die, how does Buddhism explain the world's increasing population?   

According to Buddhist cosmology, when a living being[1] passes away he or she is reborn into one of thirty-one distinct "planes" or "realms" of existence, of which the human realm is just one. An increase in the human population simply implies that creatures from other planes are being reborn into the human realm at a rate faster than humans are dying. Likewise, a decline in the human population would imply that humans, upon death, are taking rebirth in other planes (or exiting samsara altogether) at a rate faster than other creatures are taking rebirth as humans. These sorts of population shifts have been occurring for countless eons and in themselves hold little cosmic significance.

Note

1.
Except an arahant, a fully-enlightened being. Arahants have escaped the round of rebirths once and for all and, upon death, are not reborn.
If there's no self, then who gets enlightened?   
If there's no self, then what gets reborn?
If there's no self, then why...?

Nowhere in the Pali canon does Buddha categorically declare, without qualification, "There is no self."[1] Any question that begins along the lines of, "If there's no self..." is thus inherently misleading, dooming the questioner to a hopeless tangle of confusion — "a thicket of [wrong] views" [MN 2]. Such questions are best put aside altogether in favor of more fruitful lines of questioning.[2]

Notes

1.
See "The Not-self Strategy" and "No-self or Not-self?" by Thanissaro Bhikkhu
2.
See "Questions of Skill" by Thanissaro Bhikkhu
I hear the word "sangha" used a lot these days in Buddhist circles. What does it really mean?   

The Pali word "sangha" literally means "group" or "congregation," but when it is used in the suttas, the word usually refers to one of two very specific kinds of groups: either the community of Buddhist monastics (bhikkhus and bhikkhunis), or the community of people who have attained at least the first stage of Awakening. In recent decades, a new usage of the word has emerged in the West, one that seems to have no basis in classical Theravada Buddhist teachings: the usage of the word "sangha" to describe a meditation group or any sort of spiritual community.[1] It sounds innocent enough, but this particular usage can — and often does — lead to profound confusion concerning one of the most fundamental underpinnings of the Buddha's teachings, the going for refuge in the Triple Gem.

The act of going for refuge in the Buddha, Dhamma, and Sangha[2] marks a major turning point in one's spiritual development, the real start of the journey down the Buddhist path.[3] It helps foster a healthy attitude towards Buddhist practice by encouraging the development of right view, and serves as a constant reminder both of the goal of practice and of the means to achieve that goal. It is therefore crucial to be clear and precise about the meaning of the refuges, lest we end up heading down a road quite different from the one the Buddha had in mind.

In taking refuge in the Sangha, we set our inner sights on the ideal community of Noble Ones (ariya-sangha) — those monks, nuns, laywomen, and laymen who, throughout history, have by their own diligent efforts successfully carried out the Buddha's instructions and gained at least a glimpse of the supreme happiness of nibbana. If this is the direction in which we also wish to go, then it is to these individuals that we should turn for refuge:

The Sangha of the Blessed One's disciples who have practiced well... who have practiced straight-forwardly... who have practiced methodically... who have practiced masterfully — in other words, the four types [of noble disciples] when taken as pairs, the eight when taken as individual types — they are the Sangha of the Blessed One's disciples: worthy of gifts, worthy of hospitality, worthy of offerings, worthy of respect, the incomparable field of merit for the world.

— AN 11.12

But going for refuge doesn't stop there. We are also asked to turn to the monastic community (bhikkhu-sangha) for refuge, for it is thanks to the unbroken lineage of this 2,600-year-old institution that we are fortunate enough today to be able to hear the teachings. Moreover, the living example of the monastic community serves to remind us of the immense value of generosity, of living a morally upright life, of renunciation — in short, it reminds us that it is indeed possible to live a life fully in tune with every aspect of the Buddha's teachings. In reality, of course, not every monk or nun necessarily lives up to the Buddha's high standards of conduct. For this reason it is to the institution of the Sangha that we turn to refuge, not to the individual members themselves. This is the Sangha to which lay people have turned since the time of the Buddha:

I go to Master Gotama for refuge, to the Dhamma, and to the Sangha of monks. May Master Gotama remember me as a lay follower who has gone to him for refuge, from this day forward, for life.

— DN 2, MN 72, SN 51.15, AN 4.184, etc.

So it is these exceptional groups of people — the ariya-sangha and the bhikkhu-sangha — that define the Third Gem and Refuge; it is to these groups that we are asked to turn for refuge, not to some vaguely defined community of like-minded Dhamma friends and fellow meditators. In which group would you rather put your trust?

In an effort to resolve this confusion, some writers have proposed various alternatives to the word "sangha" to describe gatherings and communities of Dhamma companions.[4] But this still leaves me wondering why we must invoke the Pali language here at all. Does a meditation group really need a special name? Why not simply call it a "meditation group" and leave it at that?

"Sangha" is an important term with a rich and precise meaning. It stands for something truly extraordinary and brilliant that can constantly remind us of the highest and most excellent possibilities the Path has to offer. Let's use it well.

Notes

1.
The Buddhist Religion: A Historical Introduction (fourth edition) by R.H. Robinson & W.L. Johnson (Belmont, California: Wadsworth, 1997), p. 307.
2.
Here I follow the convention of capitalizing "Sangha" when referring to the third object of refuge.
3.
See Refuge: An Introduction to the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha by Thanissaro Bhikkhu (1997).
4.
Two such proposals are parisa (the "fourfold assembly": monks (bhikkhus), nuns (bhikkhunis), male lay followers (upasakas), and female lay followers (upasikas), regardless of spiritual attainment; see Refuge: An Introduction to the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha by Thanissaro Bhikkhu (1997)) and gana (chapter; quorum; gang).
What's the difference between a Buddha and an arahant?   

The attainment of arahantship and Buddha-hood are identical: the attainment of the Deathless (Nibbana) and the complete and irreversible eradication of the defilements, the underlying cause of suffering. It is the Buddha who (re-)discovers the Dhamma on his own; it is the arahant who puts his teachings into practice and follows in his footsteps.

Here is the Buddha's answer to this very question:

[The Buddha:] "So what difference, what distinction, what distinguishing factor is there between one rightly self-awakened and a monk discernment-released?"

[A group of monks:] "For us, lord, the teachings have the Blessed One as their root, their guide, & their arbitrator. It would be good if the Blessed One himself would explicate the meaning of this statement. Having heard it from the Blessed One, the monks will remember it."

"In that case, monks, listen & pay close attention. I will speak."

"As you say, lord," the monks responded.

The Blessed One said, "The Tathagata — the worthy one, the rightly self-awakened one — is the one who gives rise to the path (previously) unarisen, who engenders the path (previously) unengendered, who points out the path (previously) not pointed out. He knows the path, is expert in the path, is adept at the path. And his disciples now keep following the path and afterwards become endowed with the path.

"This is the difference, this the distinction, this the distinguishing between one rightly self-awakened and a monk discernment-released."

— SN 22.58

Who is Maitreya (Metteyya)?   
Have there been other Buddhas?
What's a "Private Buddha" (paccekabuddha)?

According to Theravada tradition, many Buddhas have come and gone over countless eons.[1] Every once in a great while, after a long period of spiritual darkness blankets the world, an individual is eventually born who, through his own efforts, rediscovers the long-forgotten path to Awakening and liberates himself once and for all from the long round of rebirth, thereby becoming an arahant ("worthy one," one who has fully realized Awakening). If such a being lacks the requisite development of the paramis (perfections of character), he is unable to articulate his discovery to others and is known as a "Silent" or "Private" Buddha (paccekabuddha). If, however, his paramis are fully developed, he is able to deliver his message (sasana) to the world and is called, simply, a Buddha.

Some of a Buddha's followers may themselves become arahants, but they are not Buddhas, because they required a Buddha to show them the way to Awakening. (All Buddhas and paccekabuddhas are arahants, but not all arahants are Buddhas or paccekabuddhas) No matter how far and wide the sasana spreads, sooner or later it succumbs to the inexorable law of anicca (impermanence), and fades from memory. The world descends again into darkness, and the eons-long cycle repeats.

The most recent Buddha was born Siddhattha Gotama in India in the sixth century BCE. He is the one we usually mean when we refer to "The Buddha."[2]

The next Buddha due to appear is said to be Maitreya (Skt; Pali: Metteyya), a bodhisatta currently residing in the Tusita heavens. Legend has it that at some time in the far distant future, once the teachings of the current Buddha have long been forgotten, he will be reborn as a human being, rediscover the Four Noble Truths, and teach the Noble Eightfold Path once again. Although he plays an important role in some Mahayana Buddhist traditions, whose followers appeal to him for favorable rebirth and salvation,[3] he plays an insignificant role in Theravada. I believe he's mentioned only once in the entire Tipitaka, in the Cakkavatti-Sihanada Sutta (DN 26; The Lion's Roar on the Turning of the Wheel):

[The Buddha:] And in that time of the people with an eighty-thousand-year life-span, there will arise in the world a Blessed Lord, an arahant fully enlightened Buddha named Metteyya, endowed with wisdom and conduct, a Well-farer, Knower of the worlds, incomparable Trainer of men to be tamed, Teacher of gods and humans, enlightened and blessed, just as I am now.

— The Long Discourses of the Buddha (formerly Thus Have I Heard), Maurice Walshe, trans. (Boston: Wisdom Publications, 1987), p 403f.

That jolly fellow with the large belly who appears in Chinese and Japanese art — and whose image adorns countless lawns and living rooms in the West — is Budai (Hotei), a Boddhisatta often identified as Maitreya from a previous lifetime. [4]

Notes

1.
DN 14 and DN 32 mention six previous Buddhas: Vipassi, Sikhi, Vessabhu, Kakusandha, Konagamana, and Kassapa. MN 116 includes a long list of past paccekabuddhas.
2.
The Buddhist Religion: A Historical Introduction (fourth edition) by R.H. Robinson & W.L. Johnson (Belmont, California: Wadsworth, 1997), pp. 105-6.
3.
Ibid.
4.
Ibid., p. 106. See also "Budai" in Wikipedia.

Practical Buddhism   

How can I find other people with whom to study Dhamma and practice meditation?   
  • Ask around.
  • Browse through the listings of Dhamma centers and meditation groups that are published in magazines and websites. Here are some possible sources:
  • Explore your local universities or community colleges. Do they have any Buddhist groups or clubs? Visit the student lounges, cafeterias, libraries, campus bookstore, etc. — anywhere you might find bulletin boards with announcements of campus events.
  • Look for flyers posted at local bookstores, natural food stores, "New Age"-type shops, etc.
  • Start a meditation group or Dhamma study group in your own living room. Advertise it with a flyer posted at one of the places mentioned above (ask for permission first!). You may be the only one attending for awhile, but be patient.
  • Check the telephone book (Yellow Pages), and look under "Churches" (Thai temples? Vietnamese temples?) or "Meditation." Even if you don't see exactly what you're looking for, you may at least be able to contact someone who can give you some ideas of whom to call. Someone at a Hindu ashram or a Benedictine monastery may have some suggestions.
  • More and more hospitals and health clinics offer stress-reduction and pain-control programs that make use of simplified meditation techniques borrowed from Buddhist traditions. The person in charge of one of these programs may know of ongoing Buddhist meditation groups or Dhamma centers in your area.
  • Write to someone at a monastery or Dhamma center in a neighboring city, state, province, etc. and ask for his or her suggestions.
  • Ask around.
There are no meditation centers or other Dhamma students nearby. How should I study Dhamma on my own?   

Are you sure there aren't any meditation groups or centers nearby? Even in areas dominated by other religious traditions there may be a few other people quietly and inconspicuously practicing Dhamma by themselves. With a little patient detective work you may be able to find them (see "How can I find other people with whom to study Dhamma and practice meditation?," above).

But if you really are alone, don't despair. Although having a supportive community of like-minded Dhamma friends can be a tremendous boon to your practice, you can still make headway on your own:

Observe the precepts.
Moral conduct — codified in Buddhism as the five precepts — is the absolute bedrock of spiritual progress. Get to know the five precepts well and make an effort to follow them. Learn which ones are most difficult for you to keep and what situations put you in danger of breaking them. Make adjustments in your behavior accordingly. When you break a precept, just pick yourself up, reflect on why you fell short, and make the determination not to let it happen again. Challenge yourself with the precepts, but be patient: perfecting one's morality is a lifelong practice. (See also: "The Healing Power of the Precepts.")
Choose your company with care.
The Buddha pointed out that we tend to pick up the qualities — both good and bad — of the people with whom we associate (see Iti 76). If we care about developing good qualities in ourselves, it's therefore imperative that we associate as much as possible with good people and stay away from those who have little respect for the the precepts and wisdom. But remember that Buddhists don't have a monopoly on goodness of character; you'll find plenty of people from all walks of life who have admirable attributes such as generosity, patience, kindness, truthfulness, and so on. Get to know these people and see what you can learn from them about developing goodness in yourself.
Read, read, read.
Nowadays there are countless books and pamphlets on Buddhism, transcribed Dhamma talks, translated suttas, etc., available both in print and on the Internet. Some of them are wonderful, some are rubbish; developing the discernment to distinguish one from the other is itself a crucial aspect of learning Dhamma. The Buddha's own test of authenticity is invaluable in sorting the wheat from the chaff (see AN 8.53 and the Study Guide "Recognizing the Dhamma"). Here are some good starting points:
Take a class.
If at all possible, take part in an introductory meditation workshop or retreat conducted by an experienced teacher. Even if you have to travel a long distance in order to attend, you may be rewarded with enough helpful advice to nourish your meditation and your studies for a long time to come.

Even if you don't have a community of friends, you can still learn to ask yourself good questions — questions that will propel you deeper in your understanding of Dhamma (see "Questions of Skill"). Who was the Buddha? What did he accomplish? What is the goal of Buddhist practice? What is enlightenment? Why is morality the foundation of the Buddha's teachings? What is the purpose of meditation? What is wisdom? Am I honestly following the path that the Buddha laid out? What is the role of faith? If you can keep questions like these alive in your heart, you're bound to stay on track.

I want to become a Buddhist. How do I do that?   

It begins with one deceptively simple act: making the inner commitment to "take refuge" in the Triple Gem, to accept the Buddha, Dhamma, and Sangha as your source of spiritual guidance.[1] This act is what makes one nominally "Buddhist." But going for refuge also implies a willingness — if only provisional, at first — to accept the cornerstone of the Buddha's teachings: the law of kamma. According to this universal principle, if you act unskillfully and make poor ethical choices, you are bound to suffer the consequences; if you choose wisely and act in line with the noblest ideals, you stand to benefit accordingly.[2] In other words, your happiness ultimately depends on the quality of your choices and actions; you alone are responsible for your happiness. Your first act after seeking refuge should therefore be to resolve to observe the five precepts — the five basic principles of living that can help prevent you from making grossly unskillful choices. This is where the practice of Buddhism begins.

You don't need a formal public ceremony or "initiation" to make any of this official. There are no equivalents in Buddhism to Christianity's "baptism" or "confirmation" rituals. You don't have to dress differently or wear a badge that says, "I am now a Buddhist." The practice of the Dhamma is a private matter and no one needs to know about it but you. Many Buddhists do, however, find it invaluable to renew their commitment to the Triple Gem and to the precepts from time to time in a more formal way, enlisting the help of a good friend, a respected meditation teacher, or a member of the monastic community (Sangha) as a witness.[3] Administering the refuges and precepts to laypeople is a duty that Buddhist monks are glad to perform.

Many people find it difficult to sustain their commitment to the Dhamma on their own, without the support of like-minded friends and companions. (It can be hard to stick to the precepts if you're surrounded by people who see no harm in telling lies, or in having a secret romantic affair now and then, or in going out drinking all night.) You may have to do a little patient detective work to find this kind of support (see How can I find other people with whom to study Dhamma and practice meditation?, above).

Having taken these first steps, you can proceed along the Buddhist path in your own way and at your own pace. Although you can learn a great deal about Dhamma on your own, your understanding will grow by leaps and bounds once you find a good teacher — someone whom you trust and respect, who keeps to the precepts, and who understands the Dhamma and can communicate it clearly.[4] Other aids to progress in understanding the Dhamma are these: deepening your understanding of the precepts; studying the suttas;[5] getting to know monks or nuns (the Sangha) and becoming acquainted with their traditions; developing a keen, discerning ear that can recognize which of today's popular spiritual teachings actually ring true to what the Buddha taught;[6] and learning meditation. How you proceed is entirely up to you, but the bottom line is this: learn what the Buddha taught and put it into practice in your life as best you can.

If you ever decide that the Buddha's teachings aren't for you, you are free to walk away at any time and find your own way. There is no ceremony for renouncing the Buddha's teachings. Just remember: your happiness is in your own hands.

Notes

1.
See Refuge: An Introduction to the Buddha, Dhamma, and Sangha by Thanissaro Bhikkhu.
2.
See the opening verses of the Dhammapada.
3.
For the standard Pali formula for requesting the refuges and precepts, see A Chanting Guide: Pali Passages with Translations.
4.
See "Admirable friendship (kalyanamittata)" in the Path to Freedom pages.
5.
See "Befriending the Suttas: Tips on Reading the Pali Discourses."
6.
See the Study Guide "Recognizing the Dhamma," prepared by Thanissaro Bhikkhu.

See also: "Lay Buddhist Practice" in the General Index

I'd like to have a Buddhist wedding. Any suggestions?   

In the world of Theravada Buddhism marriage is regarded as a civil contract, not as a spiritual or religious union. Thus there is no standard Buddhist liturgy for marriage. You may simply include whatever texts or passages you and your spouse-to-be find inspiring.

A wedding is an excellent time to formally renew your commitment to both the Triple Gem and the five precepts. In Buddhist countries a couple might pay a visit to the local monastery shortly before or after their wedding to offer food to the monastic community, recite the refuges and precepts in a formal way, receive a little Dhamma instruction, and possibly receive a blessing or two from the monks. If such a visit isn't possible for you, you might put together your own refuges and precepts ceremony (use the formal ceremony as a guide). You might also consider reciting the "Five Subjects for Frequent Recollection," the Maha-mangala Sutta, or any other passages that inspire you.

See also:

What were the Buddha's views on divorce?   

In Theravada Buddhism divorce (like marriage) is regarded as a civil matter, rather than a religious or spiritual one. I don't know of any suttas in which the Buddha expresses an opinion about divorce. The Buddha did, however, have some suggestions about how a couple should behave while they are married (see DN 31).

For some observations on how divorce is understood in Sri Lanka, see The Position of Women in Buddhism, by Dr. (Mrs.) L.S. Dewaraja. For more about marriage in general, see A Happy Married Life: A Buddhist Perspective, by K. Sri Dhammananda.

What were the Buddha's views on sexual orientation and gender identity?   

From what I've read in the suttas, the Buddha gave no indication that one's sexual orientation or gender identity has any bearing on one's spiritual practice. The five precepts, which form the most basic foundation of a moral life in Buddhism, encourage the abstention from "sexual misconduct," a term that generally refers to sexual activity between two people outside of a long-term committed relationship. It has nothing to do with "orientation."

The Buddha did, however, have strong words to say about sexuality/sensuality in general, as it is one of the most powerful expressions of human craving and attachment. And craving — the second Noble Truth — is a root cause of human suffering. The Buddha was very clear: if you're genuinely concerned about your long-term happiness, then it's worth reflecting deeply on the value of engaging in any activity — be it sexual or non-sexual — that feeds your cravings:

Even if it's with pain, you should abandon sensual desires if you aspire to future safety from bondage. Alert, with a mind well-released, touch release now here, now there. An attainer-of-wisdom, having fulfilled the holy life, is said to have gone to the end of the world, gone beyond.

— Iti 109

It is worth noting that the Buddha explicitly discouraged his followers — men and women, alike — from dwelling on their sexual identity (AN 7.48). Although in this particular sutta he was describing heterosexuals, the message clearly applies to us all.

What were the Buddha's views on abortion?   

Practicing Buddhists observe the five precepts as a foundation for the moral life that spiritual progress requires. The first of these precepts is to "refrain from destroying living creatures." Because Theravada Buddhism regards human life as beginning at the moment of conception,[1] killing a fetus implies killing a human being, making abortion patently incompatible with the first precept.

One indication of the seriousness with which the Buddha regarded abortion is found in the Vinaya, the collection of texts that define the conduct and duties of Buddhist monastics. According to the Vinaya, if a bhikkhu or bhikkhuni should facilitate an abortion, or if a woman should get an abortion based on their recommendation, then that bhikkhu or bhikkhuni is immediately expelled from the Sangha, having broken one of the four cardinal rules of monastic conduct.[2]

Notes

1.
According to the Pali texts, conception occurs when three things are simultaneously present: the mother (i.e., a fertile egg), the father (a sperm cell), and the gandhabba (the kammic energy of the being that is seeking rebirth). If all three successfully coincide, human consciousness arises in the fertilized ovum and rebirth occurs. For a description of this process, see the Mahatanhasankhaya Sutta (MN 38). See Bhikkhu Bodhi's translation of this sutta (along with helpful footnotes) in "The Middle Length Discourse of the Buddha" (Boston: Wisdom Publications, 1995).
2.
This rule (Parajika #3), which applies equally to bhikkhunis as well as bhikkhus, states:
Should any bhikkhu [or bhikkhuni] intentionally deprive a human being of life, or search for an assassin for him, or praise the advantages of death, or incite him to die (thus): "My good man, what use is this wretched, miserable life to you? Death would be better for you than life," or with such an idea in mind, such a purpose in mind, should in various ways praise the advantages of death or incite him to die, he [she] also is defeated and no longer in communion.

— Pr 3

The word-commentary to this rule makes clear that abortion counts as "intentionally depriving a human being of life." See The Buddhist Monastic Code, Vol. I

How should I teach Buddhism to my children?   

The Buddha's advice to parents is straightforward: help your children become generous, virtuous, responsible, skilled, and self-sufficient adults [see DN 31 and Sn 2.4]. Teaching Buddhism to one's children does not mean giving them long lectures about dependent co-arising, or forcing them to memorize the Buddha's lists of the eightfold this, the ten such-and-suches, the seventeen so-and-sos. It simply means giving them the basic skills they'll need in order to find true happiness. The rest will take care of itself.

The single most important lesson parents can convey to their children is that every action has consequences. Each moment presents us with an opportunity, and it is up to us to choose how we want to think, speak, or act. It is these choices that eventually determine our happiness. This is the essence of kamma, the basic law of cause and effect that underlies the Dhamma. It also happens to be the message behind one of the few recorded teachings the Buddha gave to his only child, Rahula.[1] This sutta — the Ambalatthikarahulovada Sutta (MN 61) — offers parents some important clues about teaching Dhamma to young children — in terms of both the content of what to teach and the method to use.

In this sutta the Buddha reprimands the seven year old Rahula for telling a small lie. The content of the Buddha's lesson here is clear and simple: it concerns right speech, and helping Rahula keep himself true to the fundamental principles of virtue. There are several noteworthy aspects to the Buddha's method. First, by artfully drawing comparisons to an everyday utensil (in this case, a water dipper), the Buddha makes his point in vivid and age-appropriate language that Rahula can easily understand. Second, the Buddha doesn't launch into a long-winded abstract lecture on the nature of kamma, but instead keeps the lesson focused on the immediate issue at hand: choosing your actions carefully. Third, although the